Party, I've had this happen with every party from my daughter's birthday to our holiday parties. I'm honestly starting to believe people do not understand what the initials R.S.V.P. stand for! I hope your party is great regardless!

I only RSVP if it's for someone I don't see or talk to that much. If it's close friends or family I usually don't. But if we're close we talk a lot and it usually comes up.

If they haven't told you to your face or through e-mail/phone then I would assume they are not coming.

If you asked for them to RSVP then they should do so.

I always do! I feel like it's so rude not to... having planned parties and events in the past, I know how frustrating it is not to receive a reply... HELLO there's something called planning! ;]

I just think a lot of people have too much going on and are too selfish to guarantee their time to you for an evening. I know a lot of my friends will do the "if-something-better-doesn't-come-up" thing which is pretty rude.

I generally don't ask for RSVP's unless food is an issue.

But I also don't use snail-mail for invitations because that is just way too expensive; it is much easier and faster to use MyPunchBowl.com or even facebook's event app.

Even if an invite doesn't say to RSVP, I always call the host/ess to see if there's anything that I can bring or do to help out. Hopefully the guests you invited read this article and realize how tacky it is to have not given you a heads up at least a week in advance!

Yes, I think RSVPing is a thing of the past. People haven't got any manners any more. Even if you include self-addressed stamped envelopes for people to reply with (such as for a wedding), half of them don't. Last time we had a party that needed a head count, we included a landline phone number, a mobile phone number (so people could text if they wanted), and an email address. Still had to chase a few people down to ask them if we should expect them or not.

Oh, and I admit, I do sometimes RSVP later than I intend to, but normally that's only with people I know well who already know to expect me/us because I mentioned it in person. I still call, though, just to make sure they know for sure.

Then again, I have good manners.

I just looked up the post for your (cute!) invites again. Your example shows "regrets only" which may be why you aren't getting RSVPs if you used the same invite to send out! I would assume that anyone that hasn't called to say they wouldn't make it will be there. Happy Birthday, Yum!

I loathe it when people don't RSVP. Why would you add RSVP and a date to your invites if you didn't feel it was necessary to have a head count ahead of time? I have had many people not RSVP and then show up anyway. This is a huge pet peeve of mine. I see more and more people using the Regrets Only option, which I think is good, but it seems to me that if people can't invest in a phone call or email response, I can't be sure they'd keep their word and attend anyway.

Wow, OhFish is right! The sample invitation here: http://www.yumsugar.com/1891443 definitely says "regrets only". Well, that might explain a lot, heheh!

This drives me nuts! A friend of my mother's just threw me a baby shower and half the people didn't RSVP - and these were ladies who know better! When I found out (the day before the shower) that my sisters-in-law hadn't RSVPed, they both received mini-lectures. It's just so rude and isn't that hard to send a quick e-mail or pick up the phone for 30 seconds. I do hope manners aren't going the way of the rotary phone...

I hate when people don't RSVP. One think you can consider though, is sending out and evite a few days after everyone has received their paper invitation. That way, they get email reminders and they can RSVP online, which a lot of people are more likely to do.

This is a pet peeve of mine. How hard is it to pick up the phone or shoot off an email to RSVP? It's so rude to the host/hostess not to respond to an invitation.

If its a requirement - then yes, definitely.

As an event coordinator I find it incredibly rude when people don't r.s.v.p.

This aggravates me to no end. I've had 4 school birthday parties for my kiddo and every time only 4-5 of the 11-12 kids RSVP. I don't understand -- how hard is it to just call? You can even leave a message! We've even had cases where they've RSVPd and then they didn't show.

I always do! I find it incredibly rude when people don't! how are you supposed to plan or have enough food? that's what the rsvp is for! i don't buy that people are too busy, i think its laziness. common courtesies seem to be going out the window and it drives me nutso.

Actually ladies, I sent a different invitation...I ended up thinking that one looked to sympathy card-ish.

I have forgotten once, and I felt so bad! Most people rsvp'd to my wedding (with postage-paid cards), but I was super pissed about the ones who didn't -- how hard is it to check yes or no and put it in the mailbox??

I love when people put options for RSVP - like email and phone - because sometimes I feel awkward calling the host who I don't know (though I still do it).

Party sugar - what did you send out - can we see? I bet it was super cute!

I share your pain! I also always send snail mail invites and ask people to R.s.v.p. At this point, I've got most of my friends (we are talking lots of clueless single guys--I'm an engineer) trained to reply to the invite. But I still usually do have to send a nag email a few days before the event to the stragglers. Miss Manners says you are totally within your rights to ask people for a response when they have not been forthcoming with it.

If a physical invitation says RSVP I always do. If a person I barely know includes me on a facebook evite with hundreds of others, I usually dont respond unless I am coming regardless of their RSVP request.

Now-a-days I think its really important for hostesses though to match invitations and RSVP requests to the style of event. Housewarming party with beer and food from costco should probably be done with an evite-like invite. You got caterers? A physical invitation is appropriate.

And there is nothing wrong (although frustrating) for the hostess to pick up the phone and say hey are you coming to my party this weekend.

uhm YES!

you know who are really good RSVP'ers? Married women (or engaged women) because you suddenly realize how f'ing rude it is of people not to reply when they should.

Of course I RSVP. The people who don't RSVP are the people who have never planned an event that involves anything more than "Hey dude, I'm going to be hanging out on my patio, stop by with a 6pack if you feel like it.."

I especially don't understand people who don't RSVP for weddings.. or worse, who show up with an extra, univited guest. All these people never think not RSVPing is no big deal because the host doesn't make a big deal out of (which is the epitome of graciousness) But do not doubt, it is rude.

I have two rules: 3 years of Christmas cards with no reciprocity, and you get taken off the list. 3 invites that result in a no-show, or a non-rsvp and you won't be invited anymore. It's amazing that I hear from some people, "Wow I sure miss those pool parties, how come you stopped throwing them??" to which I always respond, "Oh we still have them! I'd invited you to several and never heard back, so I assumed you weren't interested."

i would def RSVP for a snail-mail invitation, but i almost never get those anymore, except for weddings.

if it's like a facebook invitation, you can bite me!

I had this exact thing happen for a baby shower I was hosting! I had to call THEM to get their responses! What a waste of time!

wickedcupofjoe: "This aggravates me to no end. I've had 4 school birthday parties for my kiddo and every time only 4-5 of the 11-12 kids RSVP. I don't understand -- how hard is it to just call? You can even leave a message! We've even had cases where they've RSVPd and then they didn't show."

Yep had the same thing with kid parties. The worst are ones where you are doing them elsewhere and need a head count. Also had the opposite, at a Build-A-Bear party where they showed when they said they weren't. Nice. I wish people would get it...

Always......I make it a point to never forget, whether I'm going or not.

But what really pisses me off is when people don't have enough class to RSVP and then decide to show up anyway expecting you to roll out the red carpet for them.I always amazed at their huge balls and I wonder just what the hell could they possibly be thinking?

for me - i think that it depends on the situation. sometimes there are people who put RSVP when it's necessary to do so, and of course i would RSVP cause i think that it's rude to leave a host hanging, but there have been instancs when the invitation has had it as a request, but it wasn't necessary and in those cases, i don't really bother.

i finally gave up on the RSVP thingy.....if i invited 20...i plan to feed 20...if i have leftovers...well..more for me then..lol.

I am definitely (unintentionally) rude when it comes to R.S.V.Ping to things :/ I try not to forget but a lot of times I do. It helps if it's someone I see in which case I almost never forget (I thank them for the invite and confirm I am coming in person) or if I get the invite via email then I make a point to send a reply then and there but if requires making a call to someone I won't see for a while I admit I forget at least 50% of the time ooh im bad lol but I would definitely consider this rude behavior on my part and it shouldn't be expected by the host or hostess and I can definitely see the necessity for the practice...maybe part of the problem is a lot of us tend to over schedule ourselves and just plain forget we have failed to call

Always. It's rude not to.

I usually am one of the RSVPers who does it late, usually because I'm not sure of my work schedule, but the last thing I had to RSVP for was my high school reunion. If any of my friends have parties fancier than E-vites they don't invite me... hmmm... I'm sure that says something bad about me.

Omg. This is my new biggest pet peeve. It just happened with my son's birthday party that I've been planning for this weekend. I sent the snail mail invites out like 3wks in advance. I invited like 50 people and I got like 3 calls. I called everyone else myself because hey I need to know how much food to have. Parties are expensive and I don't want to just assume everyones coming and be stuck with a ton of food to go bad. Same thing happened to my mom last year when she planned my baby shower. So annoying. It's really not hard nor does it take a lot of time to pick up the phone and say "hey I'll be there/won't be there" end of story. Ugh.

this is happening now to me. i invited my sons class over for a halloween party this saturday and only one person rsvp. i put my phone and email.a part of me hopes everyone comes but because of this i had to buy enough food and all just in case they do all show up.